There is a girl on the Manhattan bound 7 train. Mouth agape, her glazed over, spaced out gaze burns holes into a Jameson advertisement that reads, “Maybe people like Jameson because the ads give you something to stare at when you don’t know where to look.” It is apparent this ad facilitates just that, as her vacant stare registers nothing and she wanders off into her imagination somewhere to get tangled in a web of her own thoughts and grey matter. The headphones glued into her skull appear to be the only connection into her reality. This girl is me.
At that moment I was probably trying to brew up clever quips to dazzle readers with for my first blog, but when tuning back into the mainstream frequency to find the old man across from me giving me back the same blank, open-mouthed stare, I wiped the drool off my chin and realized this is the best I’ve got; a list of my oddities that fuel my purpose of this blog.
I am:
-That girl that loves to write A LOT…about nothing…like Seinfeld…in written form…with out cool characters…or a boyfriend with a name that rhymes with a male body part.
-That girl with too many scattered thoughts in her head to formulate one clear sentence that relates to a common topic.
-That girl that stays up late by mistake, always with the intention to get up early and ultimately fails every time...it is 3:57a.m right now.
-That girl who is fashionably late…most of the time…and sometimes fashionably dressed.
-That girl who blast her electronic, hard bassed music WAY too loud.
-That girl who talks about inappropriate subjects and the most inopportune moments.
-That girl that is hard on everyone and hardest on herself.
-That girl that swears entirely too much…you may still manage to take her home to Mom...sometime…well maybe never…I’m still single.
-The girl with infinite belief that I can create and accomplish anything in my life…work in progress.
-That girl who will not only tell you ‘you have something in your teeth,’ but will help you pick it out if need be.
-That girl who loves cats…and astrology…what’s your sign? It’s totally relevant!!
-That girl that loves foreign men yet hates that they are notoriously shitty tippers…and that they eventually always leave the country…to live…permanently.
-That girl that hates drinking so much…yet works in a bar…as a bartender…serving drinks...to myself.
-That girl that finds it hilarious that no one ever talks on the subway, yet shifts uncomfortably when someone stares or flashes me a toothy grin.
-That girl who will say, talk, write, comment on just about ANY topic regardless of its subject matter...I have a lot to say...stay tuned.
-That girl, who uses untidy, poorly constructed short sentences and worse overall syntax and diction to formulate masterpieces worthy of this blog…that I heart…very much.
You have probably run into me before, or at least a version of said-type female. That girl that caused you to lean over to a friend and whisper or sparked a ‘note-to-self’ moment, then you roll your eyes, tilt your head and say “Oh, your one of those girls!”
It’s OK. I’m guilty of the same act, but never without admitting that I can frequently be labeled in the same category; Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you That Girl…in this case…which I will often refer to as…myself.
I am a walking, self-inflicted, contradiction. I am the polar opposite of myself a.k.a. a tad strain of schizophrenic…maybe. But, what the hell, it keeps life interesting and I always seem to have great stories to tell.
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